as always-the poor suffer the most

We are in the midst of a global food crisis. The supply of grains around the world is too small to fill the current demand and many are unable to purchase staple foods. When we, in the United States, begin to see stores rationing the amount of rice a person can purchase, you know the world is in trouble. We're 100 steps removed from the canary in the mine. By the time we're affected others have been long suffering.

According to a Washington Post report, there are five main causes for this crisis: Trade restrictions, fuel costs, increased demand, weather and bio fuels. Increased demand is stemming from changing diets in nations with up and coming economies. In India and China specifically, more folks have the resources to change their diets to include more meat. It takes 7 pounds of grain to produce one pound of beef and 5-7 pounds to produce a pound of pork. The increase in meat consumption is leading to more grain consumption (while producing less food).

The Post also explains that an increased demand for bio fuels in the United States has increased the price of corn around the world. (we produce over 60% of corn in the world and now use 25% of corn for bio fuel--this is up from 5%). I fully support bio fuels but our increase in bio fuel production has also dramatically raised corn prices around the world. European countries usually import corn to feed their livestock. With increased corn prices, Europe has turned to a cheaper grain--sorghum. As a result the price of sorghum, one of the cheapest grains in the world, has jumped more than 20% in 6 months. This price increase primarily affects a region where over 60% of the population lives on less than a dollar a day. Let's re-read this paragraph and think about this--Europe has begun importing the cheapest grain in the world to feed their ANIMALS. This is directly causing PEOPLE to go hungry. People or animals?

That's right folks, here in the US of A we are limited to 3 bags of rice a person at Smart and Final while around the folks who make under $1 per day are going hungry.

one of these things is not like the other...

so, if you're at your local grocery store and looking for some tampons, where would you go?

sometimes they're with the medicines and first aid, which sort of makes sense: they're related to bodily functions, and provide aid.
in some drugstores, they're near the condoms and lubes, which also makes sense: they're related to reproduction and make teenage boys giggle.
I've even noticed them near the diapers, which, yes, sort of makes sense, they're both absorbent, but is definitely a little weird...

but if you were at my local grocery, you would be wrong, wrong, wrong!! don't even check in health and beauty, because they're not there either. our aisle 15 should be renamed: WHERE THE WOMEN BELONG. or just put "Feminine Needs:" right there at the top. everyone knows ladies shop for household cleaners and laundry supplies. just let them stumble upon the unmentionables while they're at it...

seriously, the tampons are ACROSS FROM THE BLEACH and NEXT TO THE RAGS!!!

clubs

I really enjoy looking around at people's faces in a crowded club. When else will I have the opportunity to watch hundreds of relatively smart young people mouth "let's get retarded" in unison?

Biblical Stories--the morals

Sodom and Gomorrah:

Lot (nephew of Abraham) and his wife and two daughters are living in a town of sodomites.  G-d threatens to destroy the town.  Abraham asks G-d if he will save the town if there are 10 good men in it.  G-d, reluctantly agrees: 10 good men=no destruction.  Alas, all the men in the town are sodomites except Lot.  G-d, decides to destroy it but first sends two male angels to get Lot outta there.

Male angels get to Sodom, spend the night at Lot's house.  In the middle of the night, Lot and the angels awake to find the house surrounded by men demanding that Lot send his male house guests outside so they can have sex with them.  Lot refuses but offers his virgin daughters instead.  Towns people don't want virgin daughters!  Lot, wife, daughters and angels flee.

G-d says, don't look back.  Wife does, turns into a pillar of salt, Dead Sea is formed.

Lot and daughters escape to a cave.  Daughters, being, young, and very focused on reproduction, realize that in a cave with their dad they will never find a husband to impregnate them.  They get their dad drunk with wine and rape him in his sleep.  (question: how do you get wine in a cave?)

Lot and daughters are heroes. 

Moral: Consensual sodomy=BAD.  Offering your virgin daughters up to be raped by an angry, horny mob=GOOD.  Getting your dad drunk and raping him so you can bear his child=BETTER.

So today, I vetoed it.

George Bush vetoed the Torture Bill.
In this weeks' radio address he explained that"The main reason [the CIA program to detain and question key terrorist leaders] has been effective is that it allows the CIA to use specialized interrogation procedures to question a small number of the most dangerous terrorists under careful supervision. The bill Congress sent me would deprive the CIA of the authority to use these safe and lawful techniques."
The bill, S.1943, basically insists that all United States government agencies should adhere to the 19 interrogation methods that are outlined in the United States Army Field Manual [pdf]. It also aimed to prohibit the following actions:

1. Forcing an individual to be naked, perform sexual acts, or pose in a sexual manner
2. Placing a hood or sack over the head on an individual, or using or placing duct tape over the eyes of an individual
3. applying a beating, electric shock, burns or other forms of physical pain to an individual
4. subjecting an individual to the procedure known as 'waterboarding'
5. Subjecting an individual to threats or attack from a military working dog
6. Inducing hypothermia or heat injury on an individual
7. Conducting a mock execution of an individual
8. Depriving an individual of necessary food, water or medical care.

Presumably, these 8 items are the "safe and lawful" techniques Bush was referencing. While the "safe"ness and "lawful"ness of each of these items is dubious, the CIA's use of waterboarding and the present administration's refusal to classify it as torture have alarmed peace loving hippies and and members of the military alike.

Obviously, this veto is infuriating from a human rights perspective, and there are plenty of activists making that point. I would really just like to point out that this veto is annoying as shit and completely childish. This administration has asserted and added presidential powers that should not exist. Even though the military rigorously complied a manual for how to deal with enemy combatants, it is Gdubs who feels he is wise enough to decide who should and should not be tortured. And even though military experts defended and encouraged this bill, through this act of veto the president insists it is he who has the final say (guess who you gotta ask if you wanna waterboard someone.)

Just as offensive is the twisted logic that is used to justify this decision. Clearly, whoever wrote this speech assumed that whoever was listening had no powers of analysis and is completely nervous and paranoid. The rhetoric of fear and tone of impending doom in today's speech (the danger remains") is deplorable. And tired. The the kind of thoughtless allegiance it encourages is disgusting. Bush reasons that because the field guide is a public document, the "terrorists" can read up and become impervious to our interrogation methods, and therefore, secret methods are necessary. What it neglects to explain is that the field guide describes types of interrogation methods (eg. good cop/ bad cop) which are based on psychology and human dynamics and aren't necessarily things you can study for. Furthermore, it does not necessarily follow that terrorists wouldn't be able to prepare themselves for unknown physical torture. The biggest problem with this reasoning is the fact that physical torture notoriously yields false information and bad confessions.

Perhaps George Bush is depending on waterboarding and other methods of coercive torture because he once heard somewhere that "nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition !":

who is the ad wizard that came up with that one?

In case you don't pay attention to ads marketing toys to beoveralled little boys, the advertising geniuses over at Tonka Trucks recently came up with a real gem. And this one explains A LOT. Ready for it?

"Boys: They're just built different."

ohhh yeah. Boys have a penis and girls have a vagina and all that...

Seriously, i don't think this one really needs any of my commentary. Apparently I've been tuning this ad out, because i saw it for the first time today and Salon.com weighed in in October of last year. Yahoo! answers even has a page that asks "Is the commercial for tonka toys sexist?" Do we have to ask? I cant believe marketers have finally cut the bullshit and just said what we were all afraid that they were secretly thinking. And here i was hoping I was just a paranoid feminist.

takin' a ride on the racism LOLlercoaster

Thank God (the Christian one)!! A brave, American-patriot has come forward to reveal the truth about that tricky Barack Hussein Obama bin Ladin. And, basically the truth is: BLACK MUSLIM MUSLIM MUSLIM MUSLIM COMMUNIST 9/11 9/11 9/11!!!

The post titled Freedom's Enemies begins with our brave patriot explaining; "Barack Hussein Obama is an African-American who has not shared the black American experience and, by birth and blood, a Muslim for at least 31 years. His politics are rooted in Marx and socialism. He is a master at shaping his own mythology and completely unqualified to be Commander in Chief."

He then provides us with a timeline that documents Obama's grandfather's infidelities and Islamics, his father's infidelities, alcoholism and corruption (at the time of Barack Senior's alcohol-related death he was married to three women, had close ties to loose women and had sired up to eight children!!!!) and, did you know that Obama hates white Christians and is totally a devout Muslim?

The best (worst) part about this might be the comments section. Some choice reader comments include:"Yup, Senior is a believer in that four wives Muslim thing." ... "Obama swaps drugs for Marxism." ... "Angry, Hateful Black Man" ... "This guy is a hard-core, Marxist, black man."

I mean seriously, thank God we have good Christians like this to protect us from those mean old Muslim hatemongers.

Spring '08's Fashion Faux Pas: Irony

In the January 31 New York Times Style Section, in an article ominously titled "The Newly Uptight", Stephanie LaCava predicted that a "meticulously tailored look that evokes the White House years of Jacqueline Kennedy" would not only find its way onto Fashion Week's cat walks, but might even have enough staying power to replace the slightly unkempt, Warhol-esque looks that have recently dominated American fashion.

While it may or may not be interesting or even relevant that some trend-setters are wearing a new (or at least refurbished) silhouette, what is interesting is the spirit with which these styles are reportedly being designed and worn. These retro flourishes apparently do not come with wry commentary, whimsy, a wink or a nod. That's right, they are Non Ironic. LaCava alarmingly describes one sedately dressed fashionista who "has embraced the fashions of the Kennedy years without irony" and quotes a retail analyst that explains that these fashions are "harkening back to a day before there were issues." Before issues?

LaCava explains that the past "calls strongly to the present, as the country grows nervous about possible recession and a diminished role on the world stage, even as Americans seek optimism through their presidential candidates" and that the 50s and 60s call so loud because "in retrospect[they were] interlude of prosperity and stability". Hmmm. Maybe we can all just ignore the paranoia, repression and turmoil that defined that 50s and 60s and nostalgically look back, thinking fondly of how nice it was to have money to spend on Opera gloves. It seems to me that many Americans (Presidential candidates especially) have created a genealogy of American Values (aka "Family Values") and have (ironically) located the 50s and 60s as a time when these ideals were exemplified. I guess it was only a matter of time before we all started dressing that way (again).

While LaCava explains how bandeau bras, circle skirts and cinched waists reflect the "seamless appearances and tony aspirations of midcentury Middle America" she does not attempt to critique the figure of the 50s house wife or think about how corseting as a fashion trend might relate to cultural attempts to control womens bodies (did our mothers and grandmothers burn their bras for nothing?), or even ask, isn't Jacqueline Kennedy as Ironic as she is Iconic? Can you do White House Jacqueline Kennedy straight? In retrospect, aren't those buttoned up jackets and white gloves just a little bit sad?

I get it, thats not really LaCava's job. And, really, for a fashion article, this one has a surprising amount of context, and is a pretty good read. The scary thing is that it seems she did a fine job of reporting this trend. The interwebs are filled with tailored, demure images from last weeks fashion shows: retro looks offered earnestly, like quotations without puns. The tastemakers have spoken, and irony is out... and I suddenly lose all interest in fashion.

Romney drops out of race, I lose all interest in national politics

Mitt Romney dropped out of the presidential race yesterday. I knew he couldn't win, but I really liked having him around. He's the type of candidate that former senator Rick 'homosexuality = incest' Santorum endorses. He's the type of candidate who lets your baby spit up on its future. He's the type of candidate who believes in a religion that has magical mystery unicorn underwear. And now, most importantly, he's the type of candidate who is not going to be president of the United States.

Enjoy this picture of Jenna Bush epitomizing the term "drunken cliché."

Supa Dupa Fly

It's Super Tuesday again. A name perhaps more properly attributed to a department store's bargain basement blowout sale is instead assigned to one of the most important days in our ever so democratic nation. I know we're all supposed to look at (cue ear muffs for Kucinich) viable candidates like Obama and Hilary in an effort to save our sorry nation from another 4 years of republican rule but wouldn't it be great if voting in politics didn't involve so much...politics?

Fact!: there is another democratic candidate left in the race. Mike Gravel espouses and practices ideals most closely in alignment with such political powerhouses as MoveOn.org yet we see the same politicking as always in our Target or Walmart presidential races. Gravel is a bit too likely to actually fight for things like women's rights, environmental preservation, drug reform and universal healthcare. His mom and pop shop is easily steamrolled by the corporate backed juggernauts. In a perfect world Gravel would be a viable candidate and an African American woman.

Drink for thought: PBR an enemy of fun ...

Recently, I was told that PBR, my beer of choice, has some super-shady labor practices. Apparently Pabst Brewing Co snatched up a bunch of struggling breweries and runs them in a way that would make Upton Sinclair roll in his grave. Determined to squelch any erroneous rumors, I turned to the Googles.

While I couldn't find anything on labor practices at Pabst Brewing Co, I did come across multiple articles on the Pabst marketing scheme. Most of the articles focus on how Pabst rose from near ruins to become the fastest growing beer in the top-50 domestic market. Pabst pulled this off by focusing on the counter-culture.

An article in the New York Times Magazine wrote: "P.B.R.'s embrace by punks, skaters and bike messengers make it a political, ''social protest'' brand. These ''lifestyle as dissent'' or ''consumption as protest'' constituencies are about freedom and rejecting middle-class mores, and ''P.B.R. is seen as a symbol and fellow dissenter.'' Eventually all of this sounds like satire, but the punch line is that it isn't really that far off from P.B.R.'s strategy. "

I must say I totally embrace the idea of "consumption as protest" but when I become the target of a marketing scheme I feel like somewhat of a drunk cliche.

All of this brings to mind Anne Elizabeth Moore's "Unmarketable: Brandalism, Copyfighting, Mocketing, And The Erosion Of Integrity". "Unmarketable" examines what happens when cultural resistance becomes just another marketing platform.

So, what now? Do I finish the last few beers in my fridge and turn to local breweries to assuage my insatiable desire for cheap, domestic beers? Do I give up on beer altogether? Or do I just give up on my labor-loving, anti-corporate, idealistic ways?

Kucinich drops out of race, I lose all interest in national politics

Dennis Kucinich dropped out of the presidential race today. I knew he couldn't win, but I really liked having him around. As the only true progressive in the race, he brought progressive ideas to mainstream Democratic politics. When he was given the opportunity to sit at the big kids table it became clear just how moderate everyone else was. Kucinich was the only candidate who supported equal marriage rights for same-sex couples.

In a speech today, Kucinich announced a new initiative that will focus on pedestrian issues like peace, equal rights and universal healthcare. He called on his supporters to mobilize around these issues and "make the American dream more than a dream". All three of his supporters thought it was a pretty sweet idea.

I'm not a racist, but...

If you enter Martin Luther King, Jr. into "the google" the eighth result that appears is the website www.martinlutherking.org/. It sounds innocuous enough. Kind of like www.family.org
which is host to Focus on the Family, one of the leading anti-gay marriage groups. A thirty second scan of the page reveals links to pages like "Black Invention Myths".

I haven't had the time to explore the veracity of the claims on this page but I am quite confident that there are better things to do than debunk any myths about things African-Americans have or haven't invented. I guess this author is in it for the greater good, though. I can't tell you how tired I am of blacks taking credit for everything white people do. I mean next thing you know they'll be staking claim to the idea to enslave themselves in order to benefit the U.S. economy.

My favorite section is the downloadable flyers list. Students are encouraged to download and distribute the flyers as well as use the information in school reports. The flyers include such gems as Martin Luther King, Jr. is a "sexual degenerate, an America-hating Communist..." and quotes from upstanding, righteous America-loving freedom fighter, J. Edgar Hoover such as "King is a tom cat with obsessive degenerate urges."

This shit makes the internet as dangerous to the fresh-faced fifth grader as the guys who end up on "How to Catch A Predator."

bringing back archaic words: more than meets the eye

gar·boil (gärboil)

n. Archaic

Confusion; uproar.

---

[Obsolete French garbouil, from Old French, from Old Italian garbuglio, perhaps from Latin bullre, to boil.]

The discovery of this word last week on thefreedictionary tickled my brain. It's practically onomatopoeia.

Upon further research I discovered that Garboil is also the name of a decepticon. Methinks someone should start a feminist punk band by this name.